So I went ahead and did it. I turned 28, just for all of you y’hear? Just because I’m such a good friend and I didn’t want you all to think that while you were getting older that I was retaining my youth in abundance.
So I did it, all right? I’m twentyfuckingeight.
That means my 18th was 10 years ago. Not only am I legitimately allowed the free use of, “yeh, that was about 10 years ago” in natural conversations, but I am allowed them in conversations referring to myself as an adult (technically) ten whole fucking years ago. Sigh. Remember my 18th? It was grrreat.
I think my mum feels worse because I’m her youngest. Not that she’s even old. She’s positively spritely. Her energy is pretty terrific considering she’s been dealing with 3-5 year olds her entire adult life, as well the brood she made herself, and the brood we have gone on to make.
Yikes. If you have hunnersa weans, it’s more than possible that you will end up with hunnersa grandweans, aye? At least none of them live with you mum, think of poor Kyoko and Huni…
Yesterday was a derishous birthday sushifest at home. Hats aff and thunderous applause to Huni for creating a feast of roll yer ain sushi fit for kings. Kaz surprised me with a cake too, a beautiful chocolatey goodness cake pretty much based on the one I made him in Glasgow in 2009 just after Anna was born. He forgot the baking powder though, and the icing was just sugar and chocolate (I think we all have diabetes now…) so when I was attempting to cut the fucker, Kyoko was getting her knickers a twist about her guid china plate the cake was on. Quite rightly so, because the icing was definitely one to serve with a cool confident smile…and then chainsaw the shit out of to serve.
Despite requiring heavy artillery to crack open, the cake is amazin’. Pure rich and brownie-esque. Pure amazin’. If fact, sweetheart was so proud of it, he snapped it and had it up on facebook before I even knew of its existence. I made myself dinner tonight all on ma tod because Kaz is working at nights for a few more weeks and so I constructed a leafy, garlicky, noodly delight that actually ended up making me feel a wee bit sick. Kinda gutted about that part really, cos it was ded guid. So, I ate some more cake to make myself feel better, and hey, it did just that. So getitrightupye greens.
O shit, I didn’t mean that greens…I fucking love greens and shit. My dinners sometimes look like they’re still growing. And tonight’s was a pure “Mon the Hoops” on a plate. So I don’t know why I ended up feeling a wee bit sick. Maybe my body just wanted more cake?
That must have been it.
Aye, so, tomorrow is a karaoke warble and I’m really looking forward to it. Obviously I am a giant cliche wanting to sing karaoke and eat fucking sushi on my birthday but I don’t care. Sushi is delicious. And karaoke is fun. And I don’t get to do it very often despite living in Japan, so I will goddamn sing on my birthday and you will all like it. Any requests?
Kaz has been working evenings and I need to pick him up, so that means that I’ve not been drinking at all for weeks, and this means that when I do get my grubby mitts on the vodka and Canadian Club that we’ve found at bargain prices, then I’ll be a one can dan and crooning in all seriousness thinking that I’m just.that.good.
And then I’ll fall asleep or fall over or cry. Because that’s what happens when you are a responsible driver and your bevvy tolerance falls to below that of your 18 year old self…We’ll see. We’ll see.
Just to change the subject, I feel like Anna is growing like a weed. I swear she’d grown in the night last night and when I haul her out of her cot in the mornings it’s like a new version of the “harrruuumph/heeeeave/yoisho” noise comes out. Her vocabulary is expanding at a rate of naughts as well and I will let you think about what it is she actually says when she’s trying to say, “fork”. Kyoko’s head whipped around when she heard her in the kitchen the other morning…”why is she saying that? Why did you teach her that?”
(smirk smirk cos it’s funny as fork so it is.)
I just don’t draw attention to it and then agree with Anna, “yes Anna that is a fork, you’re right!”
I was directed to youtube the other night to the Jamie Oliver food revolution show he’s done in the U.S. The weans there didn’t (or t.v. made them appear to not) know what the names of some basic fruits and veggies were and that is quite rightly horrific. Anna shouts out all the stuff in her bowl and she’s 19 months old. She screeches like a banshee in the supermarket fruit&veg aisle because it’s what she knows. She likes eating so she does. Oor Anna loves her grub. I wonder who she gets that from?
Nae cake fur Anna though. Nae diabetes fur her.
No pics this post, don’t hate me. I’ll get some up soon enough. Kaz the superhero got me a hard-drive so I can finally free up some space on this wee laptop of mine and not feel so cautious about plugging in the old camera in fear of sirens and flashing lights, “your computer is too fucking full you fool, empty it. NOW!” Or something along those lines.
So I will endeavour to upload more pics in the future. Yakusoku.
Kuuuurighst…I’ve not even read this back, you can edit them after posting, right…?